Hello, everyone. I hope your weekends were relaxing. Mine actually was, believe it or not. Which makes it really hard to be at work, bring crammed in an office when really all I want to do is curl up in my jim jams with a cup of tea and watch Raising Hope. I realized over the past few months I have been down because I really had absolutely nothing to look forward to in the immediate future. Immediate future for me would be about 3 months from now. Tim and I have quite a while until we embark on our trip to Florida, which is a blessing in disguise because we are completely broke right now. The weather has been draining the housing market dry. Where is the Spring weather? Very few people want to go out and look at houses when it is miserable and cold out. One thing that has really been booming though? People have been staying inside and cuddling which has created an uncanny boom of baby and engagement announcements. I might just have too many friends on Facebook but I am serious every day someone is announcing a baby or putting up a photo of their rings. And I am so happy for all of them, I really am. But dang it, I am jealous because all this wonderful has been happening around me (spring) and I have been stuck in perma-winter since January. I have been running from Rock Hill to Lancaster to Charlotte back to Rock Hill back to Charlotte on multiple projects, listing appointments and showings. But nothing had come to fruition. I became frustrated and even doubted myself quite a bit. Add in the comparative nature Facebook to everyone else around me who seemed to be blooming, growing, and having greatness happen “to them” and I was a one woman pity party.
But this is the way of Winter and anticipation of the arrival of Spring. Life just seems to be a little less bright. The skies are grey and you can’t even feel the warmth of the sun in your car. You begin to lose hope that there will ever be a Spring, because, let’s be real here…it’s almost April and you are throwing 40 degrees tops temps at me, Mother Nature, not cool! Even when there is nothing big to look forward to in the coming days, months, or year for that matter, sometimes you have to take a step back and make a small list of things you ARE looking forward to in the immediate future. Just to, you know, keep your sanity. It’s the little things that create the most happiness.
Things I Am Looking Forward To:
- Showing houses and selling them. Nothing gives me more joy than helping people.
- Temperatures in the 70s.
- Creating a little photo wall in my house.
- Planting flowers and herbs in my garden.
- Having rehearsals for the Vagina Monologues complete and watching this wonderful show, the director, and actresses get the acclaim they deserve.
- Visiting my sister at the end of April in Charleston. She hasn’t been feeling well lately and I miss her so very much.
- Having my free time back. I debated on auditioning for a few shows but just the immense pressure I am feeling from simply stage managing, I know I need a break.
I will leave you all with this poem that is actually cross stitched and rests over my entryway area. I look at it whenever it feels like I am permanently suspended in time and nothing is moving or going the way I planned.
You Have To Believe
You have to believe in happiness,
Or happiness never comes;
I know that a bird chirps none the less
When all he finds are crumbs.
You have to believe that the buds will blow,
Believe in the grass in the days of snow;
Ah, that’s the reason a bird can sing-
On his darkest day he believes in Spring.
By Douglas Malloch
What things are you looking forward to that keep you going when you get frustrated with the present?